Growing Apart

Benjamin looked up just as the school bus stopped. He watched his mother kissed the twins goodbye and helped them climb on to the school bus. He stopped the harvester and watched until the bus disappeared up the dusty road. His mother waved to him but he didn’t return her greeting. He mopped his brow. The heat that had plagued him all summer long was not loosening its grip. 7:30 in the morning and already 90 degrees.

The twins had been too excited to sleep. Benjamin had interrupted their laughter and chatter. “Shut up and go to sleep. I can hear you nattering all the way up in the front room.” He glanced at the matching dresses hung behind the door. Sarah had made them special for the twins first day of school. He grabbed one of the dresses, clenching the carefully ironed fabric in his fist. Slowly he relaxed his grip, resisting the urge to rip the thin dresses apart. Instead he growled “If I hear one more peep out of you I’ll be bringing my belt with me.”

After the school bus disappeared Benjamin resumed his work. There was nothing before him but row after row of corn. His life would be measured out in corncobs while his sisters went off to school.

He was still in a foul mood when the bus returned the twins eight hours later.

“Benjamin! Benjamin! Look what I drew!” Rose separated herself from her twin and ran toward her brother. She ignored the clumps of dirt that spoiled her white anklets.

“Don’t you have anything to show me, Pearlie?” Benjamin called out mockingly. Pearl just shook her head and continued up the lane to the house. Benjamin’s eyes followed her as he absently looked at the drawing that Rose forced into his hand.

“It’s a picture of our family, Benjamin. See. There’s Mama and there’s you and there’s me and Pearl.” Rose had drawn him so that he towered over the other three figures in the drawing.

“Real nice. You’re a regular Rembrandt.”

“What’s a rem-brat?”

“Never mind. I’m thirsty. Let’s go get us some lemonade.

Benjamin let Rose take his hand as they walked toward the house. He found himself actually enjoying the attention of the darker twin. She seemed to worship him, never missing an opportunity to be in his presence while were sister warily avoided him.

* * *

As the twins got older, Benjamin sought out opportunities to be alone with Pearl. When he did, he liked to touch her. At first he did it because she didn’t like it. Then because he found it gave him pleasure to fondle his sister.

“Careful, Pearlie. That old rooster’s just over there. He’s going to come and get you.”

Pearl was gathering eggs when her brother appeared out of nowhere, blocking her path.

“It ain’t the rooster I’m worried about. Now move and let me pass.”

“You ain’t going no damn place until I say you can.” Benjamin looked down at Pearl. She was eleven years old – on the brink of puberty.

“Are those breasts you’ve got there, little sister?”

Pearl hugged her basket, shielding herself from Benjamin’s hungry gaze.

He pulled the basket from her grip and let it fall to the floor, breaking the eggs. He pushed her against the rough wall of the chicken house and slowly unbuttoned her shirt then he covered her small breasts with his palms, moving his hands in circles. “You are growing breasts. Do you like that, Pearlie? Do you like it when I rub you little nipples?”

“No! I don’t like it!” she said, twisting away from Benjamin’s hands. “I hate it when you touch me and I’m going to tell Mama.” She picked up her basket and ran away.

“She won’t believe you, Pearl.” He shouted after her. “She’ll just think you’re making up stories. Mama has more to worry about than your tall tales, little sister”.